Alternate Careers

Today, I had gone to an orphanage for Ganesh Puja. Listening to the priest chanting the mantras, I realized that I knew most of them, and could become a priest if I don't get a job.

So, I started wondering, what other careers could our Director, S.K. Sarangi (SKS), choose. Of course some of them would be bad choices, the others would be dream jobs.

So, Let's start with the good choices.

With infinite patience, and a story ready for every occasion he could easily become a good story-teller. He could go on and on with the same story for ages.

He could also be a good bureaucrat. I'm sure he could convince anyone in the office to scratch his nose for him, courtesy-"My hands are tied". Heck, that guy could even convince the Pope into believing he'd bedded a cheap, fat, ugly and stricken-with-the-wrong-type-of-disease hooker.

A coach. It would be a nightmare for the players. He would keep shifting the players to new positions as soon as they are accustomed to their present one. Even worse, he will assign the same position to two of the senior-most players.

A Police Inspector. What a nightmare that would be for criminals!! Imagine he encounters two thugs, and then he's face to face with them with his gun aimed at them.
SKS-"Hands up!"
Thug#1-"Was he addressing you or me?"
Thug#2-"Dunno. But he has only one gun. One of us will escape."
SKS-"Its no use guys. I shoot from the lip."

Now, the bad choices.

A prostitute. The fact that he's squint-eyed, 70 years old and has as much hair on his head as the BJP have young leaders is not the least of obstacles. Imagine him mouthing his trademark, "My hands are tied" to a customer, you'll get the picture.

An actor. The fact that he's ugly is not a problem. In fact , he's better than some of those WWE material guys with enough hair to start a wig factory who pass off as actors down south. But, wouldn't it be a bit difficult for the leading lady when he says, "Look into my eyes..."??

A call centre employee. Imagine this conversation-
SKS-"Hello, how may I help you sir?"
Customer-"My router has been on since the last 3 days, but now it seems to have stopped working."
SKS-"You see sir, the Internet was first implemented in CERN...."
After about 1 hr.
SKS-"...and that's why you should try turning it off and then on again."
Customer-"You motherf****** brown son of a brown b****!"

Lastly, but more importantly, the one that concerns us all. The Director of an educational 'Institute'. You can say your good-byes and RIP to fun.