Effects Of Hunger Strike Explored

Hunger strike is the in-thing these days. Just ask the to-be civilians of the state of Telangana. As such, it is of utmost importance that the phenomenon of hunger strike be analysed. It is a helpful tactic when blackmailing a higher authority. That and it is also of minute relevance to the Telangana issue, which means the media can fill space with such analysis when there is no other 'news' (read liaisons of celebrities) to report.

The concept of hunger strike is a very noble one, because when you go on a hunger strike, a lot of people follow suit. When a sufficiently large number of people go on a hunger strike, this causes demand for food to drop. Which means, the cost of food will drop despite the inflation and recession. Thus, hunger strike will effectively reduce the food prices, enabling the poor to buy and eat as much food as they can. Thus hunger strike is the only way to reduce hunger!

Also, as we have seen, the recession has badly affected all forms of commerce, including healthcare. With bailouts for financial firms and automotive giants, the heathcare sector has been plainly ignored. When people will go on a hunger strike, they will require some some form of medication or medical attention, which has been very recently demonstrated by KCR. A large number of people undergoing a hunger strike means an increase in the number of people requiring the services of the healtcare sector. Thus the hunger strike is a bailout for the healthcare sector from the people, for the people, by the people!


Besides, the hunger strike is the fountain of youth which will revive the aging BJP to its prime. We all know that the Telangana issue was KCR's baby. But over the years, his idealogy became outdated and lost steam, which is happening to BJP now. Cornered and faced with the possibility of having no political clout at all, KCR did what any respectable politician would do- resorting to blackmail and skullduggery.  The BJP should take a page out of the TRS's books and just go on a hunger strike. The issue is secondary, it's the hunger strike that's more important. There, problem solved, no chintan-baithak required!


The enterprising show-biz community has already been inspired by the hunger strike. The phenomenon of hunger strike will be modified on the lines of 'brain drain' to create an altogether new  concept of 'flab drain' by them. People who will gain the most from this brand-new uber concept will be people like Vandana Luthra and various modeling agencies. 'Flab drain' involves first creating a group of people consisting of Indians and firangs. Then segregate Indians from the firangs, giving a preference to the firangs. The Indians will not be provided with cutlery at all, while the firangs will be given cutlery made of silver. The reason for not providing Indians with cutlery shall be- budget constraints due to provisions of silver cutlery to the firangs. The Indians will go on a hunger strike, at the same time, the firangs will gain weight.
This will benefit obese Indians, at the same time also providing modeling agencies with models who are not overweight for a change.

There are also very minor issues like destruction of public property in the protests that follow a hunger strike, disruption of life, damage to the industry in terms of loss of production, unnecessarily diverting attention from conferences that discuss climate change and hence the future of the world,etc that shall not be discussed.

Keeping in mind the numerous positive aspects of a hunger strike, the state of  Telangana, which owes their creation to the hunger strike, have already forwarded a demand to waste money for causes other than creation of the state by setting up a diamond-studded memorial with an eternal flame signifying the eternal hunger pangs that one has to endure during hunger strikes. I'm sure Gandhiji and all those married women who fast for their husbands on Karva Chauth would be proud.

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